“How depressing it must be to be a bathroom mirror” – just one of my ridiculous thoughts of the day. Let me elaborate. Each morning, all over the world, before any clothes cover up our bodies or make up masks our faces, many people sigh, pull in their stomachs, turn around and look at how big their bum is or wobble their arm fat to see how much it jiggles. The bathroom mirror stares back hoping to see a smile but instead is greeted with disappointment. See what I mean? Depressing.
I’ve had a few conversations with different friends about confidence (body or otherwise) recently and all the conversations have led to the same conclusion. We are all in the same boat. When entering a room full of people, the majority of us will be thinking ‘are people thinking about what I’m doing/ wearing/ saying?’. No they’re not. Get over yourself – the people in the room are thinking about themselves just. like. you.
My 31 years on this earth have taught me many things, but one of the most valuable has been that most people in the world are blagging it in this game we call life. No one has a bloody clue. And while that might be a scary concept, its also super comforting. With the exception of people learning a skill (you can rarely blag this one, you should hear me play the guitar… its terrible) when it comes to understanding how to lead a happy, healthy, successful life, most people are bundling along, trying their best, just. like. you. But here’s the big lesson – you’ve got to try your best. There’s no point doing whatever you think is right by doing it half assed.
Body confidence, well thats a completely different ballgame. You’ll be hard pressed to find a photo of me in a bikini unless its taken from behind. And whilst we’re on the subject of behinds, well let’s just say I’m really glad the Kardashian style bums are so hot right now. I’ve got a small pooch/food baby/FUPA, whatever name you call it, it’s there and always has been. Now I’m pretty certain if I stuck rigidly to a diet and workout plan it wouldn’t be there, and maybe I should but here’s why I don’t; it’s my choice.
Now I’d be telling complete porkys if I told you I don’t want to look like Eva Mendes or have a body like those chicks on Love Island (don’t pretend you didn’t watch it.) and I am the first to say when someone looks banging, but how I look and feel about myself is MY choice and right now I’d say I’m feeling pretty OK about it. I 100% believe that a happy and full life is a healthy body balanced with a healthy mind. No offence to the fitness fanatics amongst you, but in my humble opinion, I don’t believe that a healthy body and mind is found only in the gym. Sure it has its benefits to your mindset – you can clear your head, push your limits and flood your bod with endorphins which feels great. I’m all about working out and exercise but NOT when it takes away from the indulgent pleasures and times. What I’m saying is, I try to do a bit of everything. Life is too short to deny yourself that cheeky takeaway or glass of wine. Workout, socialise, eat, drink, run, read, be quiet, be loud, be busy, be still but all in moderation.
Life is also too short to spend it thinking about what you dislike about yourself. You only get one ‘you’ – be grateful. Your thighs may be bulky but if they work then thank them for it! You may have a jiggle in your arms but if you can wrap them around someone you care about, then lucky you. Having a strong body and mind should be the ultimate goals. Rather than striving for a size 8 figure, strive for happiness and health. It sounds simple in one sentence but it takes a lot of effort to turn those negative thoughts about yourself off. The step after that is replacing those comments with something more loving. My beautiful friend Sarah said something in a passing comment the other day that really made me think. She was talking about how stunning her good friend was looking at the moment, and the reason wasn’t because she had recently lost weight or got a new haircut. It was because she was happy. She had fallen in love and the happiness just seeped out of her. The thoughts you think are visable to everyone around you. So make them beautiful. Then the next time you look in that mirror, give yourself a smile – I promise you’ll get a smile right back.